Coach Approach Blog

How we know for sure that all men are a bunch of m*ckity-mucks

Pardon my French. It seems like swearing and F-bombs are par for the course in a lot of blogs and newsletters I receive, and I really admire all those of you who can swear like sailors, but I'm just not very good at it yet. So, you'll probably see words like "m*ckety-mucks" in my writing. Sorry, not sorry.

But I digress. We were going to talk about how we know things. Like that thing, we all know about men.

Let's start with something simpler than men. Like a ball.

I know what a ball is like. …

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I jumped back in terror! and then laughed...

One day, I was walking down a woodland path, enjoying the sun shining to my left onto the pond, and the peaceful sounds of the breeze rustling through the leaves overhead. Suddenly, I saw a huge snake to the right side of the path, its head held up at an angle ready to strike. My heart pounded in my chest for a millisecond and I leaped back in terror. My actions were instinctual and rapid. I took no time to analyze or think through my motivations.

However, once I had jumped back, I stopped and …

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Are you moving forward or running away?

Sometimes you're just itching for a change. And many times moving to a new home, changing careers, and developing different relationships is exactly the right thing. Other times, the urge to make a change is about wiggling out of a situation that might require you to address some issues.

How can you tell the difference?

1. One indicator is whether the unwanted situation tends to recur, regardless of the environment.

For example, I repeatedly wrote curriculum, developed training, and did the t…

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What do I do with anxiety?

I'm hearing about anxiety more and more in the past couple of years, and I know it's been difficult. So I wanted to offer you some knowledge and some of my top tips to get myself back to calm.

1) Anxiety is a function of groups. It tends to run quickly through systems and is highly contagious.

Tip: Observe its movements, and when it gets to you, pay attention to your body. See how you can self-regulate with a hand on the belly and a soft breath down to the hand, instead of passing the anxiety …

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Microwave or stovetop?

Ever wonder if you've left the stovetop on? For a lot of people, it's a real question because they leave the stovetop on a couple of times a week, and then, even when they do turn it off, they worry that maybe they didn't.

If that's the way your mind works, you learn to find workarounds. For example, you can make your cup of tea in the microwave instead of boiling it in a kettle on the stove (which might sound sacrilegious if you live in Kenya or the UK).

Building empathy

Rather than feeling …

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How deep are your desires?

Some people believe that suffering and living in poverty is necessary to be truly spiritual. That idea is hidden or openly taught in many belief systems and philosophies.

And there's a nugget of truth - sometimes the lack of material possessions, wealth, or creature comforts does bring us back to the essence of our soul. I had a prayer partner for years who was with the sisters of charity, and her only possessions were two blue and white habits like the ones Mother Theresa would wear, a well-pa…

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What if you could ride the wave?

One of my all-time favorite places to be is Diani Beach. When our family lived in Kenya, we had the privilege of traveling to the coast several times and staying right on the white sandy shoreline, where I was filled with awe and wonder at each quiet sunrise, and I would wade out into the warm waves. 

I can still feel the ultimate stillness coursing through my body the moment I placed my snorkeled face into the water. Suddenly, a whole new world of light and color and movement opened up, as bri…

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Can hopelessness be creative?

Some people think coaches are overly optimistic, always focusing on the bright side and not willing to take a hard look at challenges. But you know that at Awaken, we model coaching skills that really help with overcoming obstacles, getting creative, and trying something new and brave. It takes a powerful love that's refreshing, strengthening, and invigorating. 

Drawing on the work of Steven Hayes, one approach is to develop "Creative Hopelessness". A core tenet of coaching states, "if what you…

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The freeze frame technique for getting unstuck

If you're like me, sometimes you get stuck in ruminating - having the same thoughts and feelings stuck on repeat with no movement or positive action. It's exhausting. The brain seems to have a mind of its own, quickly taking you on a path to nowhere.  

Wouldn't it be fun if you could get back in charge of yourself? 

The Freeze Frame® technique, developed by the HearthMath Institute, gives you a chance to find more efficient options and resolve problems and conflicts that may be depleting your en…

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What kind of squirrel are you?

Our friends the squirrels go through some distinct seasons.

Those that live in northern climates know just when it's time to start stockpiling for the cold winter months. They remind us that it's good and right to think and plan ahead and to conserve an investment of energy and calories for times when those are less abundant in the natural way of things.

For humans, this includes choosing what nourishes and sustains us long-term, through the cycles of life. It includes trusting that more goodn…

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